but the lizard people decide everything anyway
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
He did a backflip because drugs
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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