Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
