All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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