Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
