It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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