I'm really into asian looking animals
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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