Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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