At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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