I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Randomize
