I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
