69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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