How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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