i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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