did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize