I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
