:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Randomize
