this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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