when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
