Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize
