I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
