Why does Corona taste like a burp?
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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