I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
