so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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