i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
