how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
So squirting runs in the family.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
