idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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