Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
wow bdsm is so cute
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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