Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
