His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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