The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
