We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
