woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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