Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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