BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
