I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I understand Curling. That high.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
