I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
