I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
