blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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