he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Randomize
