super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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