I need help removing her.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize