Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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