I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
