whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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