Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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