Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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