You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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