Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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