have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize