Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
